ali's Corner. [The Loud Whispers Of Silent Evenings]

sometimes i can create an oasis.
right in my own bedroom.
the sweet smell of august coming in my windows
makes my lungs feel like they're dancing.
a cool breeze flowing in both open windows simultaneously
that makes me want to shiver, but keeps my heart warm.
crickets singing quiet songs of a coming rain
but ensure a sense of security.
low light.
just enough to make my curious eyes sleepy.
and soft indie music that tells my mind how to think with each song.

this is something that comes with every evening.
but is often taken for granted.
but what about tonight?
what about this longing desire to share it with someone?
words cant describe feelings accurately 100% all the time.
how do you capture something like this?

what about the feeling of being safe in someone else's arms?
while laying on the soft inviting cotton made up by a bed
closely embracing while the breeze softly flows over our bodies.

what about the feeling of being loved.
and not loved in the sense of family.
but loved enough to want to spend more than every minute of the rest of your life with them.

i'm not complaining. alone time is something much needed by everyone.
But sometimes its natural to feel a little tired of keeping yourself warm at night.

this past year i've realized that most of my life
i've fostered the feeling of NEEDING someone significant in my life.
when really, life is about creating yourself.
discovering and rediscovering what you, as a single person, are.

It's about making yourself a strong, completely independent individual
and then adding icing to the cake later.
This comes with alone time.
And by being alone, I've learned WHO I am.
I've learned what I like and don't like.
What I want and what I don't want.
Sometimes, I think this is why I feel so lonely.
But it filters out all the possible pains, aches and mistakes that could happen by being irrational.
--yet sometimes - that's what love is all about.
being spontaneous and crazy.
So, it's okay sometimes, to feel a little lonely.
A little sad.
Yet, a little hopeful.